'FunnyYou Should Say That!'



 

On these pages we publish  jokes, cartoons and oddities,  with a Christian connection, as well as a few that aren't religious, but which caught the website manager's fancy. Apologies are unreservedly offered to any individual or publication we have not been able to trace and acknowledge or who would have preferred not to share the joke with a wider public. Apologies likewise tendered to those who are not amused by what they read or see, or who may find any item not entirely politically correct. No apologies to those who feel that a Church website is no place for such things - we are happy to believe that God has a sense of humour, otherwise he would not have created the human race, let alone the people of Saint Faith's in general and the website manager in particular. It goes without saying that any perceived bias or incorrect thinking contained or implied by these various offerings in no way reflects the views of our church or any of its members... although many of them share this writer's unreconstructed sense of humour.

If you have a joke - or a source of humour - you would like to share, then please get in touch. Visitors are more than welcome to share, publish or plagiarise these items!

Apologies for any missing cartoons: blame managerial incompetence and supply your own drawings...

Click Here to access the first hundred offerings, posted from 2005 onwards.

Click here to access a collection of curious items (including many non-P.C. offerings) from various sources

... and here for a newer feature reproducing newspaper articles and comments on more serious topics of interest to the Christian community.





405 December 26th, 2013
The Very Sod?


The Oldie again



404 December 25th, 2013

Keeping up with the Carpenters?


 

The Oldie



403  December 20th, 2013
Happy Hacking

   
                        


                  

                                                                                       402 December 16th, 2013
                                                      Church on the Rebound







































The Oldie, December 2013
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                                                                401 November 23rd, 2013

                                                          Searching for God

                           



                                                   
400 November 18th, 2013

                            'More Tea, Vicar?'


                                               

                                                                               The Oldie


                                                      399  October 30th, 2013
                                   Would you Adam and Eve it!


A Sunday School teacher was teaching how God created everything, including human beings. One little boy seemed especially intent when she explained how Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs.

Later in the week his mother noticed him lying down as though he were ill, and she asked him what was the matter.

The little lad explained worriedly: 'I have a pain in my side.I think I'm going to have a wife.'

Thanks to St Peter's, Formby, Church magazine. 


                                                

                                                      398  October 30th, 2013
                                           Snipping the Squirrel


There were five houses of religion in a small American town: the Presbyterian Church, the Baptist Church, the Methodist Church, the Roman Catholic Church nad the Jewish Synagogue. Each of their places of worship was overrun with pesky squirrels.

One day, the Presbyterian Church called a meeting to decide what to do about the squirrels. After much prayer and consideration they determined that the squirrels were predestined to be there and they shouldn't interfere with God's divine will.

In the Baptist Church the squirrels had taken up habitation in the baptistry. The deacons met and decided to put a cover on the baptistry and drown the squirrels in it. The squirrels escaped somehow and there were twice as many there the next week. 

The Methodist Church got together and decided that they were not in a position to harm any of God's creation. So they humanely trapped the squirrels and set them free a few miles outside of town. Three days later, the squirrels were back.

The Catholic Church came up with the best and most effective Christian solution. They baptized the squirrels and registered them as members of the church. Now they only see them at Christmas and Easter.

And what about the Jewish synagogue? Not much was heard about them, but rumour has it that they took one squirrel and had a short initiation service of circumcision and they haven't seen a squirrel on the property since.

Internet circulation via an anonymous friend!



397  October 23rd, 2013
Grave Matters


The Oldie once more (who else?)



396  October 19th, 2013
Heavenly Pleasures...?



The Oldie again



395  October 17th, 2013
'With this ringtone I thee wed...'

The Oldie


394  September 24th, 2013
'Think I'll go and Eat Worms...'


The vicar decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon. Four worms were placed into four separate jars.
 The first worm was put into a container of alcohol. The second worm was put into a container of cigarette smoke.
The third worm was put into a container of chocolate syrup. The fourth worm was put into a container of good clean soil. 

At the conclusion of the sermon, the Minister reported the following results: The first worm in alcohol . . . dead.
The second worm in cigarette smoke . . . dead. Third worm in chocolate syrup . . . dead. Fourth worm in good clean soil . . . alive.

 So the vicar asked his congregation, "What did you learn from this demonstration?" 

There was silence, until one farmer at the back hazarded: "As long as you drink, smoke and eat chocolate, you won't have worms?"



393  September 19th, 2013
An Offer You Can't Refuse?

The Oldie